Holding Closely but Loosely

For the first time in nearly six months our house was quiet today. No excited (or angry) voices shrilling through the air. No thundering feet on the stairs. No arguing. This strange and eerie quiet reminded me of the first time both boys were in school. It was a mixed bag of joy and sadness to have time to myself without little people attached to me and yet still missing their presence filling the house.

Today as the kids go back to school after what I’ve heard dubbed the “five-month-long Spring Break,” I again have mixed feelings. I had time to take a walk, catch up on some long overdue housework and enjoy uninterrupted time focused on work. It was a huge relief to have 7 hours in a row to myself and yet there was a hint of sadness at not having them in the house.

This year there is such a wide variety of experiences for parents of school aged children. You may not be able to relate at all to my feelings because your kids are 100% remote learning at home, and you are still wishing for a few hours strung together where you can catch up on life! Perhaps your kids only go in-person one day a week and you are holding your breath until they leave the house and you can have a few minutes of quiet. Maybe you chose to homeschool your kids because you enjoy having them home full-time (go, Mama, go!)

Even as I enjoy the quiet around the house, I am aware it could change at any moment (and I don’t just mean at 3pm when the school day is done.) Schools could shut down again – for 2 days, 2 weeks or 2 months. My kiddos could get a cold and be stuck at home for an extended period of time until all symptoms have cleared (this is almost a definite as they always come down with a fall cold or two.) As I make plans to work, grocery shop, or meet a friend, I hold my future plans closely, but loosely.

Regardless of where you are in the spectrum, I pray you are able to find a rhythm. I know it can be challenging (or seemingly impossible) if you are working and helping your kids with remote learning at home to find time for you. This past spring I had to make the most of grabbing a few deep breaths, a moment of quiet in the shower, looking for the things I could still be thankful for and a quick moment with Jesus where I could find His peace. I pray you are able to find cracks in your day to squeeze in something refreshing. 

If you are feeling maxed out, consider joining me and a couple of my mom friends September 22, 24 and 26th for a few evenings of “me time” that will leave you feeling more refreshed and give you some tools to help you get through these trying times.